Saturday, March 15, 2014

An Ugly Day


Today started off beautifully. Snuggling with the sweetest of husbands, a hot shower, fresh coffee, baby cuddles, taking pictures of the layers of ice in the backyard.

Then the ugliness began. Jayme pees in her bed. A lot. My crabbiness over peed sheets takes over the day. The van has a flat tire. I have a follow up for my thyroid blood work. I ask the doc about a spot I've had on my shoulder for over 2 months that isn't healing. He tells me it's basal cell skin cancer. It needs to be removed. I call Jon. He tells me it's going to cost $900 to replace the tires. Which means we won't be able to start fixing up the house to sell just yet.

So set back. Set back. Set back.

I want to cry. Or punch something. Or both.

I know that regardless of everything going on right now, a lot of people have it so much worse.

My home is warm. I have plenty of food. The kids are healthy and happy, and they are receiving an amazing education. My husband has an amazing job. We have more clothes than we need. We have 2 working vehicles to drive.

Happiness is not circumstantial.

Sigh.

However, right this second I'm so blasted frustrated by everything that is happening. I have these visions of what God wants for us. Then I get another piece of the puzzle and nothing makes sense for awhile. Or we have another obstacle or challenge to over come. It feels like the door keeps getting slammed in our faces. Then, it cracks open a tiny bit...we get a peek of what is in store for us, then bam! Nope! Not yet!!

I know everything happens in perfect timing. That has been proven to me over and over again. I know it will be proven to me again. I KNOW that.

But right now, I'm just disheartened. I'm sad, and cranky, and just blah! And I also KNOW that my posts have been fairly depressing lately. You, as my readers, get to endure this with me. Thank you for that.

To end this post, here are a couple pictures from this morning. So beautiful.












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